


find me in the drift

by eyesonly



Series: FiKi Week 2018 [4]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Fili and Thorin are pilots, Kili is a K-Scientist, M/M, Pacific Rim AU, mentions of injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-11
Updated: 2018-07-11
Packaged: 2019-06-08 18:06:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15248937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eyesonly/pseuds/eyesonly
Summary: Pacific Rim AU. K-Scientist Killian Durin is thrust into a new position when his uncle is injured and his brother needs his help. The drift reveals some things.





	find me in the drift

**Author's Note:**

> FiKi Week Day 4: Science Fiction or Fantasy. I chose Science Fiction!
> 
> Anyone who knows me knows that Pacific Rim has slowly consumed my life and I am trapped in the perpetual hellscape that is Newmann. So of course I’m going to pick sci-fi and finally write my Pacific Rim AU that I’ve told @safarikalamari that I’m going to write for over a year. I wrote this in one sitting again like a crazy person.
> 
> If you’ve never watched Pacific Rim, I tried to explain the best I could within the fic so watching the movie isn’t necessary but it sure would help. Plus I need more people to join in the sadness of Newmann.

_**2025\. Hong Kong Shatterdome.** _

_Other worldly creatures, known as the Kaiju, have been terrorizing cities on the Earth’s Pacific Rim for nearly ten years. The human world has not sat idly by and let these monsters destroy the world. Jaegers, large human operated robots, have become the saving grace of the world. These Jaegers are each powered by two human pilots through a neurologically controlled processed called the Drift. The Drift allows the pilots to move in sync to operate the Jaeger, but not just any two people are able to drift. A compatibility process is necessary. Jaeger pilots often being siblings or lovers. While the Jaegers, their pilots, and the science around them are important, there are also scientists dedicated to understanding the Kaiju and how to help the Jaeger pilots find their weaknesses and eradicate them for good._

Dr. Killian “Call me, Kili” Durin was one of the leading K-scientists in the world. He held several doctorates in several fields of biology having gone to and taught at some of the most prestigious universities of the world.

While he was proud of his job and the research he had provided toward the Kaiju Wars, he was still the black sheep of the family overall. 

Back when the Kaiju had first attacked ten years prior, his two uncles became the heroes of the First Kaiju War as the top Jaeger pilots. It was assumed that he and his brother would follow in their footsteps, but that didn’t seem to be his plan.

On the other hand, his brother Philip “Please don’t call me, Fili” Durin was perhaps the best Jaeger pilot to have ever existed, or so he thought. After their Uncle Frerin’s untimely death at the end of the First Kaiju War, Fili became his Uncle Thorin’s copilot. 

The Second Kaiju War had unfortunately began, the giant Godzilla-esque monsters had been spotted outside of Sydney and all hands were back on deck after a decade of relative silence. 

Kili was excitedly elbow deep inside part of a kaiju carcass when one of the floor assistants came in with a worried look. 

“Dr. Durin, there has been an incident with _Oaken Shield_. It was severely attacked by one of the Category 3 kaiju. Your uncle and brother are being transported to med bay as we speak,” her voice is worried and a little frantic.

Kili hardly has time to clean himself off before he is running off to the medbay demanding to see his family.

Fili turns out to just have minor injuries that will heal up over a week or so of rest (Kili heard that as a day or two, knowing Fili). His uncle however was not as lucky. He was suffering from some major, but not life threatening injuries. 

His piloting career was over at the worst possible time. 

Kili knew that there would be knew kaiju coming any day, any moment, and they were officially one Jaeger team down. 

Fili had healed up in a matter of days and was already back training. He had been a Marine recruit when the First Kaiju War started. He immediately was deferred to the PPDC’s Jaeger piloting bootcamp. He was never on the deployed teams, having struggled to connect with another pilot. 

It was the cruel twist of fate that his career began at his uncle’s end. He finally made a drift compatible match with his uncle. They were able to take down some of the smaller Cat 1’s and the random kaiju sighting over the past decade. 

This kaiju was the largest either of them had seen and it was their undoing. While their drift was compatible, it wasn’t the strongest. Now he again was copilot-less and would have to try to find some random pilot to try and bond with.

It was his first day back from the accident, he was healed up but his muscles and body were still sore from a combination of disuse and the injury itself. Many other pilots and crew members filled the on-base gym full of machines as well as a private sparring room. 

Kili is working on a punching bag with another scientist when he sees his brother walk him. He excitedly launches himself in his brother’s direction, hugging him tight.

“Look at you! Good as new!” Kili grins patting his cheek teasingly.

Fili chuckles and peels him off gently.

“I need to spar, but I need to start easy. Think you can handle it?” 

Kili scoffs in offense crossing his arms.

“May I remind you that I went through all the same martial arts classes as you when we were kids. Ask Hae-Won, I was tearing that bag up over there,” he scrunches his nose. 

Fili grins clasping his shoulder and pushing him toward the sparring floor.

“Well then you have nothing to be scared of then!” He pulls his own curly blond hair into a bun and slips padded gloves onto his hands.

“Jiu jitsu rules?” He offers to his younger brother who shrugs with a smile and a nod.

“Sounds good to me.”

The two meet on the middle of the floor, one of the other pilots playing referee. Kili ignoring the whispers of mostly the other pilots.

_“He’s a scientist, Philip is going to kick his ass.”_

_“Ah, he’s injured. I bet the kid gets a good hit or two in.”_

_“Injured or not, I wouldn’t want to be on the opposite side of Philip.”_

They bump their padded knuckles against one another before the reffing pilot signals for them to begin. 

Fili easily takes Kili down on the mat within the first few second, Kili nervous about hurting his already injured brother. The knock of air out of his lungs is enough to light the spark in him. 

Kili is surprised himself when he is able to go toe to toe with his brother, each fighting and maneuvering easily around one another on the floor. When Kili finds an in and has Fili pinned to the ground and having to tap out, there is nothing but a bit grin and excitement.

Less than an hour later Kili finds himself in his uncle’s hospital room as Fili and Thorin are in the throes of an argument.

“It only makes sense Thorin! Who else better for me to drift with?”

“He isn’t like us Fili! This isn’t the life he signed up for!”

Kili clears his throat realizing he must be the topic of the argument.

“He can talk for himself, you know? Fili, you want me to...drift with you?” His voice is almost incredulous.

“You’re an amazing fighter, Kili. Sure, you need some training and some finessing, but I think you could make an amazing pilot.”

“But I’m a scientist.”

“Yes, but you can be more too! Please Kili, we can do a practice drift and if it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out. But I can’t not let us try,” Fili begs with a renewed energy.

“I don’t like this,” Thorin says resolutely from his bed.

“You don’t have to like it, Kili just has to. You’ll give it a shot, won’t you Kee?”

Kili looks between the two of them before focusing on Fili.

 

“One time. I’ll give the practice drift one shot, if I don’t like it, I’m not doing it,” He says seriously to his brother, “I’m only considering doing it because I want to see a kaiju up close and personal.”

Fili rolls his eyes but is beyond excited at the idea of having a true drift partner.

They schedule the test drift in one of the Jaeger practice pods the next day. Fili unable to wait any longer.

Even though it is just a practice, the idea of drifting has always scared him a bit. He’s heard the pilots coached enough to know that you don’t hang onto anything in the drift, you just let it ride through. 

The drift exposes each pilot to the memories, thoughts, feelings, and emotions of the other. There are no secrets in the drift. Both pilots share an intimate and genuine connection where their minds temporarily become one. 

Kili swallows nervously as he steps out in the Jaeger operating outfit, his worried eyes finding Fili who offers a reassuring smile.

“These outfits are ridiculous,” Kili nervously laughs as some of the J-tech crew shows him how to get set up in the mock Jaeger unit.

Fili laughs a little in response, needing no help himself. “Yeah, they are. Hopefully, you’ll get used to it.”

Fili’s voice switches over mid-sentence to the comm link within the helmet.

“Okay Kili, just trust me. Follow my lead and don’t hold onto anything in the drift.”

“I feel like I should start a confessional for all the fucked up things you might see in the drift, so I’m apologizing now.”

Fili laughs again as he speaks in to the mic, pushing in buttons on the HUD of the Jaeger interface, “Activating neural handshake. In 3...2...1…”

Kili gasps as a wall of blue hits his vision and he feels like he may be sick from the spiraling feeling as memories and feeling flood him. 

_He sees first days of school, Fili fighting bullies, their first martial arts classes, their sleepovers they share as children, Thorin yelling at them._

_“You are teenagers! This childhood dependency stops now.”_

_Fili being sent away for military school. Both sobbing at night, the intense heartache, emptiness._

_They feel their first hug in Hong Kong, they hadn’t seen each other in years. A decade spent making up for lost time in their childhood._

_Accidental drunken kisses. Fear, shame, they have to hide, if anyone were to know. Their lives would be over. He’d ruin Fili’s life. Fili he loves Fili but he can’t love Fili. Brothers, they are brothers and brothers aren’t like this why is he like this? Why can’t he be better? Fili don’t go-God, ithurtsithurtsmorethananythingwhycanttheyjustbetogetherwhydoesithurtsomuchmakeitstoptheblueisswallowinghimmakeitstopbrotherfilifilifilifilif-_

_“Kili, let it go!_ Kili you have to LET GO!”

He surges forward, gasping for air as he makes it onto the other side of the drift. Fili looks concerned at him from behind his helmet.

“Kee, you okay? You made it through. You’ve let it go, now let’s focus on the mission okay?” Fili orders in a reassuring tone as Kili nods catching his breath.

“Yeah, I’m good,” his breath evens out some before he pushes a smile on his face, “Let’s kick some virtual kaiju ass.”

Kili isn’t surprised when they take down the kaiju with relative ease, his mind feeling clear and strong with the guidance of Fili there. It’s reassuring and calming. Like he doesn’t have to think as hard with Fili doing half of the work as well.

Kili however is surprised when the J-tech crew excitedly clap them both on the back. 

“You guys just beat the current record of beating Knifehead! With minimal damage at that! It was incredible!”

They both are helped out of the mock Jaeger, the drift ending. Kili searches Fili’s face when he hears a soft rushed voice in the back of his head.

_So proud. I love him so much. Kili, I love you._

Fili takes off his helmet not saying anything at first. 

“Well then.”

“Well then what?” Fili says softly looking at him.

“I’m going to really, really miss my lab,” Kili sighs holding the helmet under his arm.

Fili couldn’t possibly grin brighter hearing in his own head a soft, _I love you too_.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on tumblr @ deanogarbage


End file.
